Addiction Recovery: A road less traveled

Maps are cool! I loved being a boy scout growing up. I was part of an independent scout troop. We went everywhere! It was an amazing experience for me.  One of the merit badges that I enjoyed was the orienteering merit badge. This merit badge, among other things, introduced young men to the skill of using a map to help them get from point A to point B. The first step in understanding how to use a map was to orient the map. This meant using a compass to identify which direction was north, orienting the map accordingly, and then taking the appropriate bearings.  My dad and I practice using the compass a lot, along with using a compass. We started with a map of our neighborhood. Dad would map out a route, and I would need to use our map to go from point to point until I arrived at the final location. Gradually, we traded out the neighborhood map with a topographical map of different areas were would explore.  On one specific scout camp, I recall our leaders taking us up the canyon we were

Professionally, I'm a data professional. I enjoy finding patterns, building dashboards, and performing analyses. Several months ago, I had a three screen set up: two large external screens and my laptop screen. I was productive and enjoying the good life. Then, on April 2, 2024, I became a father to a beautiful baby girl.  When I returned to work, I found my setup didn't help me. I wanted to use my external screens, but my baby girl needed attention at various spots throughout the day. I found myself complaining to my wife about not working the way I liked to and watching my baby girl while my wife was at work. After that discussion, I realized how prideful I had been and that I was the one who needed to change. As I thought about what I could do to be a good employee and still provide for my daughter while my wife was at work, this thought came to me: remove the external screens and work on just your laptop.  I initially dismissed the idea. As I worked the next few days, I con

On my recovery journey, I can honestly say much of my effort has been in the first 9 steps. Developing faith in Jesus Christ, meeting with a sponsor, meeting with bishops, and making amends are time-intensive. I often daydreamed of what my life would be like on the other side of the first 9 steps. To my surprise, life after the first 9 steps was like my life during the first 9 steps.  Let me give you one example. While I was meeting with my sponsor to discuss my progress, I noticed my sponsor get a look on his face. He asked for a quick moment, wrote something down, pulled out his phone, and shot off a text. I inquired what he had done. He smiled and told me he remembered something he had done in the past. He recognized he needed forgiveness for it and wrote down the name of the individual he needed to connect with to make amends.  I was taken aback. In a matter of minutes, my sponsor had done steps 4-9. I couldn't believe it. It had taken me days, and sometimes weeks, to work thro

There is a big push in the world today to develop passive income. The advertisements to develop passive income can be seen all over social media, news outlets, and folks just talking about it. For those who don’t know, passive income is an income stream that brings in money with minimal effort. It basically requires a little investment up front and then it runs itself. This idea of passive income made me think of addiction and addiction recovery. Addiction is similar to passive income. Addiction starts small, with a little ‘investment’. Then it begins to build. The addiction develops into something bigger and bigger. Soon enough, it’s a raging monster that is out of control. Addiction recovery, however, is not passive at all. Addiction recovery takes effort and determination. Addiction recovery takes consistent, daily effort no matter where you are along the addiction recovery journey. This realization that addiction recovery is not passive didn’t click for me for some time. I just e

A common question I had before I started my addiction recovery journey was where can I turn to for peace? I had landed in a place where all I wanted was peace, and I could not find it. I had learned to turn to the thing that was driving me to destruction. Pornography was not bringing me peace. It was leading me to absolute hell. I didn’t really know where to turn to. What I didn’t realize was it wasn’t a question of where to turn to. It was a question of who can I turn to? One of my favorite hymns, “Where can I Turn for Peace?” , provides an answer to that question. In verse 2, we read, “Where, when my aching grows, Where, when I languish, Where, in my need to know, where can I run? Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish? Who, who can understand? He, only One.” The who that we can all turn to is Jesus Christ. If you were like me, the thought of turning to Jesus Christ was daunting. The idea of getting support from Jesus Christ was scary. I honestly thought I was too far gone to b

The largest organism in the world isn’t exactly what you think. I know for me, I always thought something like the blue whale was the largest organism in the world. Can you imagine my surprise when I learned one of the largest organisms in the world is my home state of Utah! There is an aspen grove in central Utah next to Fish Lake named Pando . This grove of aspen trees is thousands of years old and spans 108 acres. One of the many reasons why this grove of aspen trees has lasted so long is it’s root system. Under the ground, all the roots are intertwined together. So when storms and winds come through the valley, each tree anchors another tree. So in all reality, the only way to blow down one tree is to blow them all over. It is easy to see how Pando’s strength has come from the storms and winds affecting it. Let’s consider one tree in the aspen grove. As a storm comes through, the tree will recognize it needs to grow a thicker trunk to withstand the wind. Additionally, since the tr