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Showing posts from May, 2023

Be Purposeful

There is an acronym in the addiction recovery world known as BLAST. This acronym highlights five of the most common triggers for addicts. These triggers are Bored, Lonely, Angry, Stressed, and Tired. With my addiction, I have answered each one of these triggers, I have inappropriately used technology to address my trigger. As you can imagine, this ultimately led to more anxiety, depression, and relapse. I want to give a recent example of how I was triggered and chose to hide in technology. Tax season can be stressful for everyone. I don’t necessarily like finances or talking about them. They can stress me out. During one such financial talk between myself, my wife, and an accountant, I found myself scrolling social media instead of participating in the conversation. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was stressed and answered the trigger with technology. Later, my wife asked me some questions and stated she felt alone because I hid in social media. It was an eye-opening experience

The Value of Good Books

The value of books has, for a large part of my life, been lost on me. There was a time in fifth grade when I was all about books. This was because it was a challenge, and I wanted to win. At the end of the year, I was the first student in the class to read 25 books and claim the win! Do I really remember which books I read? No, but I wasn’t trying to remember which books I read - I just wanted to win. Since then, my book reading has been limited to school and work employment rather than for personal growth and entertainment. This led me to a lot of screen time. Lots of screen time usually leads to boredom. For me, boredom is a trigger. That route usually led me to relapses. Another issue with screens is all the anxiety and depression that arise from screen time. At one point in time, I had work email on my phone. What did this lead to? Stress and anxiety from the first of the day. I would struggle to be emotionally available for my wife, family, and friends. Why? Because I started my d

Step 3: Trust in God

The saying “caught between a rock and a hard place” is a great way to summarize addiction. The rock in this situation is the ideal life. Doing all the right things in all the right ways. No more addiction because it’s gone. Serving with a great attitude and smiling everywhere. On the other side is the hard place. Let’s consider addiction the hard place. It’s a life that is well-known and difficult to let go of. It’s a place where addicts ‘think’ it is safe when in reality, it isn’t. So, what is a person to do? The solution might not be what you think. With this ideal life and addiction bearing down, the best thing to do is look up and stop holding on to either side. Looking up is symbolic of the idea of letting God step in and direct. By letting go of both sides and giving it up to God, you give to God the one thing that is truly yours to give: your agency. Elder Neil A Maxwell, of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, said: “The submission of one’s will is really the only uniquely pers

Step 2: Hope

One of my favorite movie series is the Lord of the Rings. In this amazing adventure, a young halfing, Frodo, carries a dangerous and evil piece of jewelry - a ring. Frodo’s task is to cast the ring into a volcano known as the Fires of Mordor. During Frodo’s adventure, he is accompanied by his friend, Sam. During their travels, the weight of carrying the ring begins to press on Frodo. He changes from a loving, happy individual to an angry, depressed, and sad individual. Finally, Frodo and Sam arrive at this volcano. Before entering, and during a moment of rest, Sam asks Frodo if he remembers certain things about their home and past. Frodo, with sadness, looks back at Sam and admits that he does not remember those things. All he can remember is the darkness this ring has brought. Sam, his lifelong friend, is also sad that this burden Frodo carries has caused him to remember so much. The adventure continues for Frodo and Sam. They have a great fight and struggle to put the ring in the F