Addiction Recovery: A road less traveled

One thing I've learned about hopeful people is they are patient with others. More importantly, they are patient with themselves. They understand life is a process and there are things that require time. The beautiful thing about the process, or journey, is the sights that are seen along the way. During my recovery journey, I have learned that being hopeful is synonymous with being patient with myself. I would say things like "I'm an eternal optimist for everyone else and an eternal pessimist about myself." Doesn't sound like someone with a lot of hope, right? Well, in all honesty, I was operating more on fear and doubt than I was hope. I wanted hope and I wanted it right now. I figured sprinting through the steps would make me feel better. I have learned since then the value of patience in developing hope. Hope is a beautiful seed that times to grow. The more time spent nurturing the seed, the more hope can grow into a strong, beautiful flower. Once it blossoms, i...

I'm a huge fan of comeback stories. They are inspiring and uplifting. These stories lift up hearts and fill them with hope. More importantly, the stories reinforce the fact if one can do it, all can do it. In my opinion, the journey of addiction recovery is among the best comeback stories ever told. In this journey, an addict goes from the depths of addiction to the freedom found in recovery. The best part of the story: this story gets told over and over again! To this day, I love hearing about these comeback stories. This brings me to a question that I posed to myself, and those that I sponsor: What is your comeback story? Even if you have been sober for a period of time and then relapse - focus on your comeback story. More specifically, what do you want your comeback story to be? When I think of my comeback story, it started with recognizing I was in a place that I didn't like. I was in a dark place and saw no hope. Many consider this moment as rock bottom. It was at this poi...

So, if you read my last post, you will see that I took a month between my last post in January and my most recent post in February. I got out of rhythm for writing and I want to say I'm sorry. Here are my plans for this blog in the future. I have found that I like to free-write. I like to sit down at my computer and just write. In that light, I'm going to try to post something each day. It could be something small like 100 words or it could be something like 1,000+ words. I want to just write from my heart and spend less time refining my words. Yes, this might make some reading a little rocky, but I want to use these daily posts to improve my writing as well. I'm looking forward to just writing a few ideas out each day. I will still follow my plan that each month is tied to a step in the ARP program. It might change in the future, but as of right now, that's my plan.  Thanks for reading my blog! Cheers!

My addiction recovery story started with hopelessness. I was stuck. I didn't have enough to keep me going each day. I was in a vicious cycle where I would relapse, make a concerted effort to not relapse, get triggered, and then relapse again. This cycle can take a mental toll on anyone. When I would relapse and I made a goal of not relapsing for the next 30, 60, or 90 days, I had this thought in the back of my head: "If I can make it that long... I bet I won't."  In 2020, I remember talking to an individual, who I consider my brother, and he gave me some advice he used in his recovery. He would, for all intents and purposes, bribe himself. If he was struggling that day, he would say that if he can get through the day without relapsing, I will get a treat and a soda. I gravitated to this idea because it was something I could see. I could see the end goal; however, I soon realized that my sobriety was not long-lasting. I found that I would still go get the reward even i...